Onlive Video Tutorials

Ok, online video tutorials are great, but I have one pet peeve about them that's driving me insane.

So, let's say you're looking at a tutorial on how to unclog a 3D printer.  For the sake of argument, let's use a hypothetical 3D printer called, a "Printeron A2."  You go to YouTube and search for, "How to unclog a Printeron A2."  Then you get a whole bunch of tutorials and you click on the first one thinking, "there are a million videos, what are the chances that —the first video I click on— is gonna be bad?"

Now here's the part that irritates me.  You click on the video and it starts off with some guy introducing himself and his channel, because that's why I came to the video, not to find out how to change my fucking printer cartridge, but to see some douchebag introducing himself.  I know you can fast forward but it's not wise because you might miss important information.

I mean it's not like I came to the video to find out how to unclog my 3D printer; it's so that I could listen to —a narcissistic douchebag— plug what you're already watching.  Here is a list of the things that I want to see or hear about when I watch a tutorial video:

• How to do —what the tutorial is supposed to tell me how to do.—

Now here's a list of things I don't want to see or hear about in a tutorial video:

• Your name
• Your channel name
• Your sponsors
• The cause of —the problem that I'm trying to fix—
• How to prevent —the problem that I'm trying to fix—
• What causes —the problem that I'm trying to fix—
• ANYTHING OTHER THAN HOW TO FIX THE PROBLEM

IF YOU PUT OTHER INFORMATION, PUT IT IN THE END AND DON'T PUT YOUR FUCKING FACE ON THE THUMBNAIL.  I don't give a shit what you look like unless your face is magical and I can get my device to repair itself just by looking at a picture of it (your face.)

I watch tutorials to find out how to fix MY DEVICES.  If you're doing tutorials just to promote yourself then put a warning at the beginning or get it the fuck off the Internet.

When my device breaks and I watch a video about how to fix it, I do not care about anything in the video unless it has to do with fixing it (my device!)  Listen, if I have to look up a tutorial to do something, chances are that it's complicated and tedious enough without hearing you talk about yourself.  If you want to talk about yourself and your issues like I'm doing in a video, do a blog.

When you do a video, follow this rule: unless you're in danger and/or being held captive and the only way to get the word out is to put the information in a tutorial, or you actually want to tell me how to fix my problem in a tutorial, SHUT THE FUCK UP!